Courteney Cox, you dirty, dirty girl…

4/13/2008

“In Lieu of Flowers”

Only Lucy can get off right after talking about her recently deceased publisher’s hard on in a body bag. And that’s why I love her.

Yes, “Dirt” is my dirty little secret, that guilty pleasure I just can’t stop watching. To be honest, it could be the fact someone so closely connected to the tabloid fodder could executively produce and star in a show that pulls its story lines from the hottest tabloid stories and embellishes them even more. Sometimes I wonder if we’re getting more of the story than the real tabloids report. Could be wishful thinking on my part. My name is Dominique, and I’m a tabloid whore.

I was a bit disappointed this episode was more drama than comedy, but you win some, you lose some. What makes me even more disappointed is this could be the last episode ever, seeing as how there were only seven episodes produced before the writer’s strike, and there’s no word yet on whether or not FX will order any more. I’m keeping my fingers crossed, anyone else? Let me know in the forums. On to tonight’s headlines…

Yes, Brent Barrow is dead. Lucy’s mom is dead. It’s a depressing way to kick off an episode, and all the death and emotion brought this one down a bit.

I don’t think Lucy could ever be too cold, and her few show of emotion are a little off-putting, but my one exception to this rule is her relationship with Don Konkey. That’s why I was so happy to hear Lucy tell him, “I’m glad to see that you’re healthy enough to stand to for me” when he blows a big story in order to protect Sharlee Cates, the Britney Spears of the Dirt world. (More on Sharlee in a moment.)That relationship is allowed to have some feeling, I suppose, and Don’s character and his relationship with Lucy is the one thing that brings some depth to this silly little dramedy. Sure, they have their little social commentary on the perils of fame, the viciousness of the paparazzi, blah blah blah, but we’ve heard it all before. The one interesting, real aspect of t his show is the genuine, platonic love they have for each other, and even she knows that deep down that crazy little man is the only thing keeping her likeable to the general audience.

Sharlee Cates. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed with her character. I know, I know, we’ve seen her story before, the shaving of the head, the hot Madonna kiss, but there’s something so sweet and vulnerable about Ashley Johnson’s portrayal of the character that makes me want to hold her and tell her everything will be all right.

My major turn-off on this show is the relationship drama. Lucy and Holt, will they or won’t they? Of course, at the end of this episode, they decide they’re “on again,” but how long will that last, and honestly, who cares? The only good part of watching that relationship unfold is we sometimes get to see Lucy half naked. But couldn’t they have found a hotter guy, someone whose eyes don’t scream, “I just smoke a blunt all by myself!” Half the time, I’m not sure Josh Stewart (who plays Holt McLaren) is actually awake for his scenes.

Willa and Farber are only a little more entertaining, and even with their volatile love affair, I find myself zoning out. Willa betrayed sweet, sweet Farber by turning his gay actor friend into a story. Good going Willa, you’ve proven you’re a huge b*!ch. Too bad you’ll never play that role as well as Lucy.

So, a little bit of a bummer if this is a series finale. Lucy did have one good line, however, when the new boss Adam Proteau confides he found a sex tape of Lucy and Brent Barrow. It makes for a great reveal when we find out it’s Willa in a wig on the tape, but it also gives Lucy the line of the night.

“Barrow and me? Give me some credit. I wouldn’t bang him with your d!